Loving you

Friday, April 22, 2005

I have really no idea what i am doing and what to do...i really dont know believing a miracles and perserverance do help..i really want to and i wish to...but sometimes those disappointments makes me feel that its no use..today while playing basketball, she smsed everyone but not me..although its stupid and yes i am jealous, why she would sms other people but not me? i dont understand...though i noe the chances are not high..and she dont like me..but i really wish to try my luck and really hope that my perserverance does pay off..i really do like her alot..i really dont dare to sms her, call her nor make myself noticed to her..i am afraid she will slowly avoid me. i am so scared of rejection, i am so scared to feel that same sad feeling i once felt ...i really hate all these feelings...sigh...i noe its stupid...and i noe people wil say just follow your heart and let nature take its course..i will still continue drawing..and on her birthday give her my best sketch i could give...and i noe wif no talent...hardwork will pay off..i really hope that god dont disappoint me.. well...."jiayou --> myself"

UnfortunateHappenings back to the past on 12:52 AM

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

back at blogging....well nothing new nor much..thinking of how fragile life can be..haha...saying such things can be stupid but by just watching the show "hello blackjack" mainly talking about this trainee doctor trying to save this two premature babies, twins,both boys. Seeing how hard these two premature babies fight to live really make me feel shamelss and to those who wanted to die or commit suicide..People out there wanting to live in this world so badly yet there are idiots out there because of some small setbacks and want to give up their precious life by commiting suicide. By watching this show makes me feel how lucky am i, able to grow up to be able to quarrel with my parents, tells me how blissful am i and how God loves me. And by knowing how fragile and blissful life can be, the more i feel that one should never live to regret and this makes me feel although with setbacks and disappointments I should never give up what i am fighting for and live for. The people i should be thanking and grateful for are my parents for giving me and letting me live in such a comfortable life that many other people would wish for. And for the things i am fighting for and wishing for i should not give up, wooing after will still be the thing i am fighting for and i will never give up!
Though the first step might be late and with many steps to come along, i finally about the things that sketching a person needs..haha..well, sketch books, pencil, eraser and ruler. now i really need now is a picture of her...happy picture i need ;)
after all that i will start to fight for my wish and dream , although that should not be the only ones...haha. ;P Wish me luck !
Lastly, taking the chance to thank my parents and i am definately sorry for all the trouble and unhappiness i had caused.Love them. (sorry, sounded too much like a girl..too mushy ya? )
ANyway! Signing Off! Miss her!! and my PARENTS.. ;)

UnfortunateHappenings back to the past on 10:54 PM

Wednesday, April 13, 2005

Its Right , i guess the whole entire blog stinks like hell just like what church said.But i still feel its not the blog that stinks. Its me. Today went to the turf city race, well was happy to see her...but didnt understand why she is kinda ignoring and avoiding me...i think she sense it that i liked her alot..knowing all the awkwardness i think its natrual for her to feel this way. i dont blame her but it still hurt my heart. i really wish that she will be nicer to me. sigh. signing off

UnfortunateHappenings back to the past on 11:15 PM

Today is anita's race ..she will be running in turf city..raelly feell ike going..both want to cheer for her and most importantly wanna go see her..since morning before i woke up i am thinking of whether to go or not..no..not to go or not...am i able to g0 or not . Thinking anyone of them would call me or ask me to go along.. Yesterday smsed her...but no reply..i sometiems dont udnerstand...am i really that irritating or annoying till that people find it difficult to accept the way i am. there are hardly any reason for me to feel positive about life..its so tiring and troublesome. All i ask for is a happy family and a girl i like. thinking of so many things in my mind i can hardly sleep well either. thinking of all ways to make her happy, to make her birthday a best one in her life..but its HARD...planning of such things need really times and organisation..am i able to take up the task? i really hope so...People always say dont do thigns that will make u regret..think thrice and decide what to do and from Naruto's favourite quote " I am Lousy at Giving Up! " Sometimes hearing to what naruto says really make me feel positive again no matter how disappointing the day may be. I believe in Mircale though its so fake but i still believe in it. i wish to believe in it, and i dont want to make myself regret this time. i really like her alot. i really do! i wont! GIVE! UP ! AGAIN!

UnfortunateHappenings back to the past on 10:52 AM

Monday, April 11, 2005

Today..woken up by my parents so early in the morning when i had a very tiring day yesterday..nothing to say..played soccer yesterday from 5pm - 9 pm plus ..4 hr plus of playing...though tiring still FUN! had many spectaculuar shot.haha!so...when i went home..i FORGOT to bring my CONTACT LENS! arg! couldnt believe..everything was so rush in the morning..then i meet siwei and peiqin at bukit batok to go to Cyndi autograph session. though boring, but for brother..i dont mind..lol.. so hot i tell u the place..sweating like a water tap.after that went back to siwei's house to change a short and shirt..den went to play street soccer...sucks! this time was sucks...i realised i cant play soccer after eating..but funny thing is SIWEI that idiot can.. hm...weird body he has..-_-''
Now, listening to Mr Lonely - Akon...i miss her alot..looking at my wallpaper . only she caught my eyes...nothing else..miss her so badly..really wish to let her noe...Love her alot..wish that one day she will noe..I wont give a single hope or pecentage of chance i would have..i will be persistant and positive. :)

UnfortunateHappenings back to the past on 12:21 AM

Friday, April 08, 2005

Today was real tiring..haha..woken up by quite a few sms-es. Foong, my good friend asked me out for lunch but i rejected her..cos i was really tired then, feeling so guilty now haha..cos after awhile i found myself awakened and couldnt sleep much further...so i went out to my pc which was on the whole entire night and noticed that brother Sze has Nudged me 2 times..haha...he asked if i wanted to go lunch wif him...at that point of time..a rather hungry me agreed to his request and we met up at mac and ate , and after that we decided to play ball..damnedz him...just finish eating not longer then five mins..he want to go play ball...make my stomach pain like hell..haha..wads there to laugh? stupid..-_-
so we played wif bala which we met at mac, and played till 8 plus night when we started at 3 plus afternoon..damnedz! was it hot today..felt like a roasted pig under the sun running around . ha..then came this china boy..14 yrs old but have a body of a 18 yr old asshole..haha..playing wif him was a really bad idea..1st, he wasnt shy about drinking my 100 plus so many times as if he bought it himself..i mean..i dont know him, he dont know me..fuck, how would i noe if he has aids or not..0.o" ...2nd, the way he play has no creativity at all..everything also follow me..-_- darnz..playing wif him was so boring..as time flies..i grew hostil towards him making every ball a hard kick..but most of the times. ball flew in other directions.=P haha
now typing in my cousin's room when she is bombing iraq and her blk 257 toilet bowl, she will be back ani min...hope tomorrow's gonna be a good day for me..
hope i would have a chance to see her...=)
Signing off~ ciaoz~

UnfortunateHappenings back to the past on 1:03 AM

Thursday, April 07, 2005

All I Have To Give

I don't know what he does to make you crybut I'll be there to make you smileI don't have a fancy carto get to you I'd walk a thousand milesI don't care if he buys you nice thingsDoes his gifts come from the heart - I don't know...But if you were my girlI'd make it so we'd never be apart
But my love is all I have to giveWithout you I don't think I can liveI wish I could give the world to you... butLove is all I have to give(give..)
When you talk(when you talk), does it seem like he's noteven listening to a word you say?That's ok babe, just tell me your problemsI'll try my best to kiss them all AWAY...Does he leave(does he leave) when you need him the most?Does his friends get all your side?Baby please, I'm on my kneespraying for the day that you'll be mine!
To you... Hey girl, I don't want you to cry no more - insideAll the money in the world could never add up to all the loveI have inside...I love you
And I will give it to youAll I can give, all I can giveEverything I have is for youBut my love is all I have to give
But my love is all I have to givewithout you I don't think I can live
I wish I could give the world to youbut love is all I have to give to you

UnfortunateHappenings back to the past on 8:24 AM

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

Haha...today like i said earlier..i went out wif siwei, so hot today..sweating away..arg..we took taxi there..thankfully..siwei paid.haha..so we went to mount elizabeth hospital..hmm..if i am not wrong..i was born there..haha! He said that hospital was expensive..hmm, thinking to myself then why u come here!? ha. after that we went to clark quay to look for the stall..DAmnedz...when we reacht here...not longer then 1 hr..it started to rain! darnz..haha..den we went around clark quay..den walk cross TCC , saw this girl..quite pretty..haha..siwei and i go funny.hahah...den siwei and i went there to drink . after the rain stop, we went home...as we were walking home..that girl had finish work..haha...so we talked to her..haha..got her no. haha..-_-...But still.. i was disappointed. cos i know wad i want and was looking for..ARg.darnz..waste 1 day walking around doing nothing..damnedz.. after that went back to bukit batok library to borrow the book on sketching..and now back at home..so bored..need not to say..i would say the same usual thing like before..Yes i miss her..=) ALOT
signing off...night

UnfortunateHappenings back to the past on 11:47 PM

Today...This morning, went out to find my Best brother of all, and yet the one which dont trust nor like me the most.. just feel like i am making a fool out of myself...anyway..today was real fun at first..i meet up wif bro at 11.30am at jurong point to have brunch at long john..haha..guess wad..who i saw? A babe..lolx....a senior of mine.which i admired a long time ago..quite a pleasant suprise for me to see her once again...aniway..after the lunch.we went to walk around jurong point like the past..it really makes me feel happy..( come on..dont think i am gay! I am a Guy who takes friendship and brothership seriously) we went to play arcade..haha..that was real fun..we played this shooting game..very furni...about racing.lolx..hah..dont know how to explain either..haha...after everything...we went back to sch..brother need to look for his wife..while i took a chance to go back to have a look at her...haha..waited for quite a long time..but took the chance to talk to my most respected teacher..Ms Gopal..haha...we chatted for awhile about poly and stuffs...den Siwei came to sch..to look for us..quite angry wif him though..HE IS SUPPOSE TO ACCOMPANY ME TO CLARKE QUAY/BOAT QUAY to look for something impt! Hmph...aniway..after everything...i finally got to see her....SO HAPPY!..i noe its kinda stupid just looking at her makes me happy..hmm..after that..we went to westmall to buy caramel and that furni coffee of hers..I NAMED her drink IDIOT..but INSTEAD! I GOT THAT NAME for MYSELF! ARG!...haha..furni though..after that....si wei, she and me took 176 back home..haha...happily spending time wif her..talking to her...every sec..i was looking at her...after that, i called bro..to talk about something unpleasant which happen..i really dont wish the same thing to happen again..cos i really take our brothership seriously...aniway...good things dont last..so let nature take its course..hmm..dont feel like going back home after that...so went to my COUSIN house..i know its kinda bad for me to disturb them so much..but just dont wish to go home and quarrel wif my family again..it really sucked!....

haiz...now..thniking of the past...i would really sit down and cry...regretting..why would i do something ilke that..really wish i could one day turn back time and undone my mistakes.
Just wanna say i really really love her from the bottom of my heart..

~Chill ouT~

UnfortunateHappenings back to the past on 12:22 AM

Monday, April 04, 2005

A New bloG have Started....A series Of Unfortunate Events Happening...WElcomE

UnfortunateHappenings back to the past on 7:56 PM