its currently 2.13am now...i just finish watching the Full House drama series...finally a happy ending...its all i want ...to see in every story...though it will be boring to see one everyday...but to me...its all i wanted ....in my life...i also want a happy ending, a happy life....a interesting and meaningful story...a story which consists of all my family members....my friends...brothers....and her...how i wish i could have a story the same as them....a happy one...why is it so hard to find one these days...or is it only me? unable to find the things i want...i think the things which can help me relieve all the pain is music....
music is my best friend now..listening to music expresses my every feelings...sad...happy..angry...whatever...which is why...now music to me in my life is a very important thing...haha...guess what? i have a new ambition...i really want to go to korea for once...to experience how the people over there lives...i really hope to a korean myself...their language....culture....everything...it makes me feel like i am living in a very nice soothing place...with so many things able to happen everyday..ha...
everyday live on 2 bottles of alcohol is it enough? i could hardly feel the kick...i could hardly make myself drunk...i want to be in my own world of fantasy...its the only way i can find the life i want...everytime i have to fantasize my life the way i hope it would be....haha...is it kinda pathetic? thinking of stupid things..irrelevant to life...maybe thats wad i am..a very impractical person...i am the only who keeps on thinking of the impossible..and maybe which is why i am the only who always wanna fight against whats been "decided" ...i really wanna make things my way...which is why i always wanted to fight against thing thats opposing me...i wanna make my life a more happening and imaginary one...as irrealistic as possible...this world today is very real...everyone have a motive behind their back..its so scary to come of think about it...i dont want..i wanna live in a world whereby everyone can really rely on each other no need to worry about..haha...man...i feel like a girl..-_-" its so retard...haha...
i'm mentally tired now...i am really feeling lost...i dont know what i really want in life....i feel so meaningless...can anyone tell me whats my purpose and what are the things i should do?
The few things i know is
1) study for my future
2)be filial to my parents
3)take care of them when they are old
4)earn as much money as possible
5) give my parents a comfortable life
guess these are the few things...haha...yup...i think there will be no time for me...;) i think thats really the main prioties....anyway...i give up to life..;)
night to all...
